Not your Average Jo

Aleita's birth story

2010-05-10T00:28:00.002+10:00

It was my first mother’s day as a new mom. YAY! My baby Aleita officially turned 1 month old yesterday so I decided to write down and share her birth story least I forget.

My labour started on Saturday the 10th of April, the day before my baby’s estimated due date. I remember being so convinced that day that the weekend would not pass before my baby’s arrival even though I had not experienced even one Braxton hicks contraction during my entire pregnancy.

I was a mash-up of emotions that day, swivelling from nervousness to excitement. As it was my first pregnancy I really had no idea what to expect labour wise apart from reading tonnes of birth stories and lots of pregnancy books for some preparation. My partner and I had also attended two birth classes in which we were inundated by pregnancy and labour information.

I woke up at 6.30 a.m. that morning feeling heavily pregnant. I immediately proceeded to the kitchen to make a lot of mandazis (a traditional donut like pastry) for breakfast as I could not sleep any longer. Looking back now I can only assign this to a bizarre manifestation of the nesting instinct as I am not an early riser! Later that day I texted my good friend Nancy (who was also my doula) to inform her that I was thoroughly convinced that bub would arrive before the weekend was over. She said that she would cancel her night shift at work and come over to my place later that afternoon to keep me company and see how things went. I really hoped, that for her sake at least, bub would make an appearance sooner rather than later otherwise it would have been wasted effort.

I washed my hair that afternoon and had my mum braid it so that I wouldn’t have it bother me during labour and the first few weeks after the birth. It was while she was braiding me that I started experiencing mild period like pain. The time was 5pm.My initials thoughts were that this could go on for days or weeks because the pain was not as intense as I thought it would be. It was quite bearable. My contractions were very consistent at 10 minutes apart and lasting for 45 seconds. This was the case up until 1.30 am when I finally decided to go into my bed and get some sleep as the waiting for ‘something major to happen’ was taking a toll on me.

At exactly 4.36 am, my waters broke with a loud pop and gushing of waters. I woke up with a start and informed my partner of the happenings and I have never seen him shoot up so fast from bed.I think I was calmer than he was at that moment. It was so funny that I tried my best to stifle a laugh because I didn’t want to precipitate things further at that stage.

We got to the hospital at 5.45am and by 6am I had already been checked into my birthing suite. My birthing team consisted of my partner, my doula, my mother and a new midwife was assigned to me during the hospital shift changes as I was under shared care.

By 8.30 am my contractions were still consistently at 10 minutes apart/ 45 seconds long so the midwife suggested that I they might have to inject me with oxytocin in order to progress things further. I objected to this as I felt it was better to leave my body to its own steady rhythm.

By 10.30 am my cervix had dilated to almost 4 cm naturally and I was happy with my decision not to induce labour. It was after the doctor had given me the internal check that my contractions became painfully acute. I was already managing my pain with gas/air and the TENS machine and had to increase the doses at this point.

At 1.30 pm I was entering the transition stage, which to me was the hardest yard. It took all my will power to resist the urge to push even when my body was screaming for me to push because the baby’s pressure was unbearable. The contractions felt so severe at this point that in the end I felt the gas and TENS machine were not helping in easing my pain at all, although it did help a bit to bite onto the gas pipe as I rode each contraction. My doula and midwife agreed to inject me with pethidine at this stage as it was in my birth plan. In retrospect the TENS machine did help take the edge off by sending tingling sensations up my back and in so doing it distracted me from the intense pain and pressure down below.

It took an intense 45 minutes for me to push my baby out. This stage was not painful but was highly uncomfortable akin to the urge to push a brick out of your rear end! My efforts were not strong enough as my baby’s head kept retracting back after the each contraction. Finally at breaking point, I remember calling out to Jesus to give me the strength I needed to push my baby out once and for all.With the next contraction I really gave it my all as my doula voiced encouragement.Aleita was expelled out fast and hard onto my chest within a fraction of a second at exactly 2.46 pm. All I managed to say was, “ Oh my baby! Isn’t she big!” Almost immediately all the pain was forgotten.

37 weeks...and loving my baby bump.

2010-03-26T15:32:00.004+11:00

{Please do not download images without explicit permission from me.}

"You do what you do, and that eventually breaks through the inaccurate label and the attempt to label."
-D.Banhart.(musician)

Back to Basics- Baby Wearing

2010-02-08T18:04:00.008+11:00

In recent times, baby wearing has become an increasingly popular trend with sensible yet fashion conscious moms (and dads!) There have been many proponents to this growing movement whereby many new parents are shunning other baby carrying methods such as prams and capsules in preference for the humble looking baby sling, although some slings may come in not-so-humble prices as I recently found out while surfing the net for one.

In Kenya and many African countries, baby wearing is steeped in tradition.Women being the dominant care givers in these societies have always been given to wearing their babies on their backs as they carry out their daily household chores such as cooking,washing the laundry (using their two God given hands for scrubbing the clothes), grinding flour or even when they are out in the fields picking tea, and etc.For these women, baby wearing has essentially been perceived as a way of killing two birds with one stone, so to speak, as they can soothe their babies to sleep as they accomplish the work at hand.

Many African women have normally improvised their baby slings by using whatever suitable cloth that is around them, be it a large towel, khanga or leso and even bedding sheets so long as it is size-able enough to tie into two tight knots at the front while baby is snuggly secured on their backs.Truly the makings of a simple ,adjustable ~~not to mention affordable~~ baby sling! Of course the material has to be strong enough to hold the baby in...as it is all about functionality for these women.For them, fashion sense (~~Scenario: Exotic African woman poses mid-stance in tea plantation thinking, "How good does my baby look on my back in that sling?~~") comes a distant second when it comes to baby wearing! Click here to read an amusing short story titled "Carrying my baby African Style" for further insight into the African tradition of baby wearing.

Image from africaA-Z

As I mentioned before, I noticed that in first world countries like Australia, where I now live with my husband, the case is reversed whereby baby wearing is seen first and foremost as a fashion statement.There are a myriad of baby slings now on offer in the market and they come in all types of fabric, colours, shapes, sizes and prices.The organic-made ones seem to be especially dearest both sentimentally and monetarily speaking.

For me, looking for a baby sling online was a crush and burn experience.Whenever I found what I thought was the ideal sling, it turned out to be too expensive for what it was (especially once you add in the shipping costs) ,or not in available my size, as was the case was on eBay ,or just not appealing enough.Finally, I decided to make my own handmade baby sling!

Having bought my first sewing machine a few weeks ago, I watched a quick tutorial on YouTube on how to make a pouch sling.Turns out that I needed needle and thread (dah!) so I made a quick trip to the shops early the next morning (a humongous exertion in 30 degree whether) and within an hour of coming back home I had made my own baby sling. The satisfaction factor made it all worth the effort.Here is an E for the Elephant Lady! (I am now 31weeks pregnant. My hubbie has dubbed me The Whale. He rolls me around the house and about grocery shopping when he should really prop me up on the damn trolley! Before I digress, what is it with the pregnant lady duck walk?)

Here are some pictures I took immediately after I had made my reversible pouch sling.

I was so excited and bubbling with energy that day.It's made from rich organic cotton cloth that my mother brought from Kenya, which I hadn't found very useful until now...

Kikoi cloth from Kenya

is 100% organic cotton.

I am now planning on making another baby sling out of semi-stretchable fabric for the hubbie as mine might be too small for him. I am sure Lita will love snuggling next to her papa in her baby sling.

Gotta go now and rub my tummy as Lita is fighting for some attention. Also, by sheer coincidence I found a similar post to this one on Progressive Pioneer .She documents the process she went through when making her own baby sling. I do love her life philosophy. Such a kindred spirit!

Blogger in Draft - What a gem!

2010-02-07T01:40:00.004+11:00

This week I have been making a few discoveries about Blogger gadgets and I must say that finding Blogger in Draft today ,~~where the hell have you been hiding?~~, was the best find. I'm loving all the new features in it compared to Blogger (beta?), which I have being using for quite sometime now but was never fully satisfied with.

Blogger in Draft has an improved posting interface which enhances the user experience.Plus it's pretty easy to switch to and fro the two interfaces, whichever you fancy. I assure you that checking it out will be worth your while as it is bound to exhilarate your blogging experience as it did mine!

Now if the people at Microsoft windows can do something about their blog feature so that people like me can effectively publish to blogger via MS windows, that would be ~~not the solution to world peace~~ a great help!

"You do what you do, and that eventually breaks through the inaccurate label and the attempt to label."
-D.Banhart.(musician)

House Renovation 101- Some Befores & Afters

2010-02-05T21:21:00.001+11:00

Just a collage showing some of the house renovations we have completed so far.We still have a lot to do but we are getting there...

"You do what you do, and that eventually breaks through the inaccurate label and the attempt to label."
-D.Banhart.(musician)

My Pregnancy at 30 weeks

2010-02-04T22:45:00.005+11:00

So far I must say that this pregnancy has treated me kindly.Lately I feel like I am on such a natural high and I must say I love what these pregnancy hormones are doing to me.I definitely have that pregnancy glow( and I thought it was just something people said to make you feel better when you actually really looked like a blown up futon.)

As my due date (April 11) nears, I am growing more confident that my baby Lita is getting stronger and more viable for this tough world we live in. She has been very active over the last two weeks, giving me hard kicks as she is running out of room in my womb. My bump now feels as solid as a rock! It is just amazing how much I have popped out in the last few days, although I must say my bump is relatively small compared to many pregnant women's.

I got pretty positive feedback from my last hospital visit.I had been anxiously anticipating the outcome of my gestational diabetes test.The midwife informed me that my test reading came at 4.9.That was a huge relief as I was dreading the thought of having to inject myself with insulin shots as I really hate needles.Nevertheless I have to keep up with my diet and in some ways improve on eating my greens as I am very low on iron.I am now taking vitamin D supplements as well as iron supplements daily as well as my multi-vitamins.

Finally, I got my first sewing machine three weeks ago and with it come a surge of intense creativity.Or is this what they term as the nesting instinct? For a beginner, I am pretty impressed with what I have accomplished on my machine so far. I have already made a baby sling for Lita after watching this simple to follow tutorial on how to make a pouch sling for baby.

I have also finished hemming my new curtains and I am already thinking of ways to alter my old jeans so that I can fit my growing belly into them.Sometimes I get carried away day dreaming of ways to breath new life into my old tired clothes or going to the op shop and getting items to redesign (recycle). I have grand ideas at the moment! Maybe I can start my own fashion clothing line of recycled clothing. But at the moment my sewing machine is keeping me very busy in these last stages of pregnancy and the days do seem to be zooming by.

Hubby and I have also been renovating our house in readiness for bub.To tell the truth Hubby has been doing most of the work!He's been so supportive and nurturing.I count myself very lucky to have such a caring partner. The baby nursery is far from ready but we have been busy purchasing the baby essentials over the last few weeks and getting seconds from close friends. We still have to paint the nursery walls and set everything in place although I don't think Lita will be using her room at least until she is 3 months old.

Today my hubby decided to drive to Sydney for the weekend to visit his folks and at the same time pick up a surf ski that he bought off ebay.I can't bear to be apart from him.To say the least,I am missing my baby boo:-( Anyway I gotta call it a night.I will try and post pics of our ongoing house renovations soon!

* Image by Sabrina Eras

Popping out!

2010-02-03T18:36:00.000+11:00

My pregnancy so far...

2010-01-16T19:15:00.004+11:00

Literally speaking...

2010-01-15T10:41:00.003+11:00

Being pregnant has given me a whole new outlook on the phrase, "a pregnant pause."

I feel like one long pregnant pause!

Songs For Bub - 27weeks

2010-01-14T11:44:00.002+11:00

Here is a compilation list of songs I made for Ally.I will be adding to this list and very open to more suggestions. I am now 27weeks + 3days pregnant.

I'm Yours-Jason Mraz
If I Aint Got You- Alicia Keys
Is This Love- Bob Marley
Can't Take My Eyes Off You- Cake version
Capri- Colby Caliat
Yellow- Coldplay
Sleep Like A Child- Joss Stone
Bubbly- Colby Caliat
Upside Down- Jack Johnson
Better Together- Jack Johnson
My Own Two Hands- Jack Johnson & Ben Harper
Lullaby- Dixie Chicks
Quelqu'un m'a dit - Carla Bruni
Paper Aeroplane- Angus &Julia Stone
I'm Every Woman- Chaka Khan version
So Beautiful- Darren Hayes
Leaving On A Jet Plane- Chantal Kreviazuk
Flaws and All- Beyonce Knowles
Halo- Beyonce Knowles
Ave Maria- Beyonce Knowles version
It aint what you do it 's the way you do it-Funny Boy Three & Bananarama
Come Away With Me- Norah Jones

Full List - 25 Best Blogs 2009 - TIME

2010-01-03T15:21:00.003+11:00

Full List - 25 Best Blogs 2009 - TIME

Here is a list of the best blogs of 2009 according to TIME Magazine.

As 2010 approached, I promised myself that I would not make any of those ridiculous resolution lists that never amount to nothing other than disappointment. Twelve months down the lane I tend to realize that it was all wishful thinking and then I have to start all over again!Urrghh!

This year I am gonna live a step at a time and make fun lists and at the end of it, God's will, I will write down a list of things that I have achieved, so that I can look back at the past year and smile!

Happy 2010!

Godspeed!

20 weeks ultrasound (3D)

2010-01-03T14:38:00.001+11:00

Here is the 3D scan of bub at 20 weeks.Its taken a while for me to upload this as I am currently 25weeks pregnant.Baby Ally looks like she is praying.

Q’s & A’s : Grit and Glory

2009-12-23T13:54:00.001+11:00

Q’s & A’s : Grit and Glory

I love Q&A's like this one from Grit and Glory, a blog I am following, and since I just added the Blog This! Extension (available through Google Chrome) to my page, I decided to share her post.

Here are my answers to the questions she posed:

Breakfast for dinner, dinner for breakfast, or neither? Definitely breakfast for dinner
What’s the best movie you’ve seen recently? Watched Dan In Real Life last week and found it both funny and touching.
Favorite Christmas tradition? Just being with family.
What song best describes you today? Hmm...
Least favorite sound? I don't like sudden loud noises but mostly certainly detest rat noises, scratching etc on walls and floor especially at night!
What author or speaker has impacted your life the most? Eh...Oprah?
Describe your ideal vacation.I have always wanted to visit Vietnam.
What’s the oddest thing in view right now, wherever you are? My hubbie painting the walls...as I happily sit and blog!
Biggest hope for 2010? That my baby Ally will come out just right and look like a minnie me!(I'm 24weeks pregnant , only 12-14weeks to go!)
What’s one blog I should read that I might not already be reading? Yet to find out...quite open to suggestions.

Happy Holidays Everyone!

2009-12-22T18:49:00.002+11:00

Just Right...

2009-12-18T20:27:00.000+11:00

This disco ball effect occurs on summer afternoons (in our spare room, soon to be baby nursery) for only a couple of minutes when the sun's rays hit the ball at just the right angle.

Truly magical, isn't it!

Simply Red

2009-10-15T18:08:00.006+11:00

This post has been lurking in my head for a few days now but I just couldn't bring myself to type a complete sentence as I have been mentally and physically exhausted lately. (Bub must be undergoing a super mega huge growth-spurt.)

Firstly, I just want to write about my 2 dollar shoes that have kept me going for close to a year now. I got them from a Brotherhood of St Laurence Op Shop. It wasn't love at first sight but my hubby had come along with me that day and he convinced me that the shoes totally suited me. So I got them because I figured that 2 dollars was a very pocket friendly price and that if I didn't like them after 2 weeks I could always take them back . Well, thing is, after a few wears I was totally hooked to these shoes.

No other pair of shoe I've ever worn has fitted me perfectly (Please note: I have an extremely big toe and I always find it tricky getting the perfect fit of shoe as I lie between a size 6 and a 7), and none ever suited my everyday needs like my simply red flat- heeled shoes .

Unfortunately, all things come to an end. After months and days of walking, running and dancing in my shoes the soles are giving in to the wear and tear. I thought about getting the soles replaced but that would be far more expensive than I purchased them for. I don't think it will be worth the effort. I can only liken the whole experience to this: Once you lose your virginity, there is no taking it back…

So here is an ode to my simply red shoes.

You have been with me through thick and thin.

I will always have a place in my heart (and blog) for you.
Thanks for the memories and the comfort!

I forgot what else I wanted to write about.(Please excuse my scantiness…It's called having a baby brain.)

Song in my head: Whitney Houston - My Own Strength

( I love that Whitney is back. Kudos!)

Mood: Tired and sick of the weather(but thankful for the rain!-Our rainwater tank is finally brimful.)

Pregnancy so far: 14 weeks and 2days.

This is how I feel...

2009-10-15T14:31:00.001+11:00

12 week ultrasound

2009-10-08T19:56:00.007+11:00

I am 13 weeks and 2 days pregnant. Today, I had my 12 week ultrasound and a blood test to check for DS (Down Syndrome) albeit a week later than it is recommended.

My relationship with my GP is pretty much non-existent. This is the first time

I ever needed to see a GP here in Australia to assess my health on a frequent basis.

My family doctor, whom I have a good rapport with, is back in Kenya. Anyway, it's been really difficult for me to build a good doctor- patient relationship with the GP I am currently seeing for a number of reasons;

1, He is a male doctor- it would be much easier to interact with a female doctor.

2, I have only seen him two times before , mainly for referrals for blood tests and ultrasounds- nothing major.

3, He is a nice guy, but I have a feeling from my experiences with him that only an iota of pregnant women grace his door.

Therefore, due to the reasons above, whenever I visit him, he never recommends the ideal tests that I need to do. I never get any extra information from him apart from the stuff I am reading from pregnancy books like Kaz Cooke's Up The Duff (Which I must say has been immensely helpful so far.)

So anyway, today I went with my hubby to see the ultrasound technician for my late 12 week scan. She asked me if I had also done the recommended blood test (at 10 weeks) for the DS check, to which I replied , ' No! '

She informed me that it was absolutely urgent that I get a referral letter from my GP for the blood test( as soon as yesterday), as the blood test and scan assessments go hand in hand in checking for DS and giving a 90% assessment. So immediately after she completed the scan( all things were in place and very normal according to her) we headed to my GP's office(a minute away) to get the referral letter for pathology but we encountered one little hurdle: My GP's Receptionist.

The Bitch is from hell and cold as ice. I have never met an inflexible, narrow-minded, thick-skinned individual like her. Despite the fact that there was hardly anyone waiting to see the doctor at the time, she absolutely refused to let us see the doctor for just a minute of his time to scribble down a quick referral. We tried to explain the urgency of the matter and also pointed out the fact that it was in fact the GP's over site not to recommend the blood test together with the ultrasound. Anyway, it soon became apparent that there was no way in hell that we were going to get past the bitch. She even showed us the appointment book just to emphasis how totally busy the doctor was. So in the end, I caved in for an appointment slotted very early (9.45am!) the next morning.I was in no mood to get upset. I was still giddy from seeing my baby scans minutes before and this bitch wasn't gonna take that happy feeling away from me.

It was already lunch time when we parted ways with hubby because he still had loads of office work to do. He decided he would try a last attempt at getting through to the doctor when he got back to the office and would let me know the result.

I took a tram to Qv and roamed the food court there, not particularly interested in eating anything specific but I was hungry. So I ended up at Breadtop and picked a sausage roll, a bacon croissant and some green iced tea. I went halfway through the bacon croissant then decided I didn't like it. So I finished the sausage roll and was sipping on some green tea when hubby called me on my cell to inform me that he had managed to get hold of my GP and that my referral letter was ready for pick up. All I had to do was get from his receptionist. Some how that didn't faze me a bit coz I decided that she treated everyone the same(like trash) and I wasn't any different.

Anyway, I finished my tucker, headed back to my GP's , picked up the letter and got my blood drawn at St. Vincent's Pathology. All in a span of 15 minutes. Viola! Very easy, despite 'someone' wanting to make things very difficult.

So,in the end I can only look forward to get transferred soon to an Obstetric at the public hospital. Yesterday, I sent my other referral letter to the pregnancy booking clinic at the Royal Women's - this was also a late booking due to my GP's apparent clueless-ness. Hey, I thought I was the one with the baby brain? Jeez, c'mon! Hello???!!! I am a first time mother-to be. I shouldn't be having half the answers to everything.(But thank God for those baby books I have been reading, otherwise I'd be swarmped CLUELESS.)

I can't wait to get to see the specialists. At least they will know how to do their job without any prompting. Anywaaaaaaayyyyyy! I'm outta here, but before I go here are some baby pics from the scan I had today.

3D image of baby showing where it lies in my womb.

The Hand!

Finally a post...in starts and stops...

2009-10-04T18:31:00.011+11:00

Its been ages since I last blogged here such that I cant exactly say I am picking off where I left .

I don't even think that will be possible for me to continue in the same continuum or even in the same frame of mind because a lot has happened in between posts. This year has been a very eventful one for me.

I got hitched in May to my partner of two years. Yay!

And now am proud to say that I am 3 months expectant with my first child!Big yay!

This is the first time I am putting the big news out there for the rest of the world, and I've told a few friends and my immediate family only last week. I have come to the end of my first trimester and can only hope that things get easier from now on (in terms of controlling raging hormones and maintaining a semblance of sanity!)

While I can positively say I have not experienced any nasty morning sickness , I have had a few days when the nausea just decides to kick in and stay.Being pregnant is no camping holiday but I must appreciate the fact that my body seems to be handling it pretty well.I am coping by drinking lots of ginger and sucking on eucalyptus lollies.This baby is gonna come out smelling like either or both!

Apart from that I am in great anticipation of the next few months.Pregnancy is already a huge learning curve for me and I expect that motherhood will also teach me a thing or two ! I have to book for my second (12 week)ultrasound tomorrow, which I think I have left a little too late to do.I went solo for my first ultrasound during week 9 but this time I plan on having hubby present.The lady technician who did the scan last time said that everything looked normal.The baby measured 2.56cm from head to rump and looked like a small grey blob on the monitor.I couldn't exactly relate to the image on the monitor, never the less it was the first time that it actually hit home that I had something growing (and moving) inside of me!The baby's heart-beat was was normal too …

Here is an image of the baby at 9 weeks.

I am also looking forward to the coming weekend as I am planning a BBQ at our place, so that I have a chance to share the news with the rest of my friends.I know a few of my friends have seen this coming for a while now so it won't be a major surprise for them.It's just important for me to make an official baby announcement , so that no one is surprised 6 months from now when they see me in the streets pramming a baby who may or may not look like me!

Oh God, I hope she looks like me…(I desperately want a baby girl!) I even have the prefect name in store for her although I have to give the husband credit for wanting this particular name for our baby.Left to me,I would have probably selected a boring name for her.My best friend almost puked when I once suggested Lavinia for a baby name. I don’t know why,but I thought it was a good choice at the time :(

Anyway, if this baby happens to be a boy, oh boy! He shall be raised like a girl!He will be raised in a similar manner to that of a last-born Samoan boy in a family of 5 boys!He will be raised with female etiquette and sensitivity!On the other hand,knowing myself, he may very well end up being a spoiled mama's boy.Hmm! In the meantime, we will cross those bridges when we come to them.

I REALLY WANT A GIRL!

Hubby and I did everything to maximize our chances of having a girl.If I get a baby girl, I will be sure to blog with unequivocal conviction and in scientifically proven manner of tone about "How to successfully conceive a baby girl."

For now, I can only hope that everything we did to get a girl won't be in vain.

An Ode to the Earth Son: Obama

2009-01-22T11:54:00.011+11:00

WITH THE WORLD ON HIS SHOULDERS,

CAN THIS MAN SAVE THE PLANET EARTH?

Lately, I have been musing over fact that one individual can have such an enormous effect on the lives of so many. Whether the effect be good or bad is subject to another post of its own merit but in that same note, I have wanted to do post on Obama for so long and today after seeing this image of him from this website, I got inspired to write something small. Call it an ode’ to Obama: The most powerful man on earth today.

I didn’t want to regurgitate the sentiments of other people. After percolating for a while about my own feelings towards Obama, I can sum him up to be : The Earth Son.

For me, he represents a new dawn and makes me elated to be in a generation where anyone can soar to great heights in spite of their background.

I am amazed at how President Obama, a man with black roots has become a symbol of hope not only for many Americans but for many people in the world. His rise to power is steep but I’m sure for a person of colour, he had to work twice or even thrice as hard as his white counterparts to get to where he is.

Of course, behind every successful man is a woman, and Michelle Obama has truly been “his rock”.

When I look at Obama, I see a Leader but I also see a Servant. Sometimes, I can’t help but be overcome with emotion whenever they air him on TV. I don’t think no one person in the world has ever had so much goodwill behind him like President Obama has and I do pray that his time in that revered seat will truly make a difference the world-over.

Click here for President Barrack Obama's Inaugural Speech.

Hello 2009!

2009-01-19T19:09:00.002+11:00

I am finally back and ready as I will ever be to resume my blogging escapades.

I was actually perplexed when I saw that I had made only one blog entry in the past year. 2008 was pretty heavy and I seem to be hit by a mild form of amnesia because I cannot for the life of me remember half the events that happened last year, and thanks to my not blogging about it: yester year shall forever be a mystery to me!

My last chance at retrieving some memory of 2008 lies in my PC’s CPU, which, at the moment, lies at the heart of a very humongous pile of boxes in my new spare room.

I moved house over the weekend. Strike that, the actual moving started last Thursday and went on through Sunday. It was like a never ending story but with lots of perseverance, a lot of hauling, pushing and shoving, my partner and I completed the nightmarish task of moving.

Goodbye neurotic neighbours, hello new humble abode!

Our new house is actually an old house. It has been part-way renovated and you can tell by just looking at it that it was much loved and taken care of by the previous owners. I am actually excited by the fact that adjacent to it on the west side is a kids park and huge gum trees that provide shade to that side of our house. Additional features that endear me to the new place is its high ceilings (3m high) and a brick feature wall which I shall avoid touching right now coz its crumbling! All it needs is a sealant and velour! It will be good as new!

Its been 35 degrees today, but because our house is well orientated to the north and is moderately thermally insulated, it was pretty comfortable inside today, which is a reprieve for me because I was doing some heavy work today and could do without the extra sweat.

The rest of the week is gonna be pretty much extreme weather with a top of 40 degrees on some days. I shall safely hibernate under my new roof.

On the flip side, not everything is that rosy about my new place. Well we do have a beautiful rose garden but that’s beside the point. While placing one of my desks, we found out that the floor is not level and my desk was precariously slanting towards the corner. I guess there had to be a catch...seems that one or two stumps have slumped due to settling of the house. O...o...we overlooked that minor detail...but for now I shall enjoy my new space with its little surprises as I remain aware that there are myriads of people out there who are not so lucky to have a roof above their head.

Below is just some of the things that are left to unpack.The spare room is not so spare right now.I don't even wanna look at it right now.

The Kidnapped Music Tour

2008-05-07T10:54:00.016+10:00

From the, The Adventures of Late Bloomer.

It was 4 Minutes to the start of The St. Kilda Beach Front Music Tour featuring a plethora of musicians from both sides of the hemisphere. Madonna and Justin Timberlake were to kick off the event with their current number one hit and were also to co-Emcee the event but they were nowhere to be seen!

Speculation was doing rounds within the crowd already gathered there, regarding the whereabouts of the two music icons, when perturbing images came up simultaneously on the casting screens all over the venue showing the pale, gagged faces of the dynamic duo.They were wriggling on a dirt floor. Gob-smacked terror tattooed on their faces. A masked felon, with a gun, held a placard with these words on it:

MADONNA AND JUSTIN KIDNAPPED.

RANSOM WANTED: 50 MILLION EUROS

BY MIDNITE 2MRW OR ELSE…

DETAILS TO BE POSTED L8R.

A few screams of protest were belted out and pandemonium quickly built up when ardent fans began to realize the implications of the kidnapping.

“Damn it! No show?” Some obviously self-centered fan moaned, “ I just bought last-minute tickets on ebay for an arm and leg! Nigga this suxxxs!”

Marge’s and JT’s publicists and managers were the ones hardest hit by the implications of the kidnapping. This was their ultimate nightmare, two times over. What a bloody catastrophe!

The Police (Not Sting and his band), I mean, the real boys and girls in blue were called to investigate the serious flaws that enabled the kidnapping. In less than an hour, news of the kidnapping had blown over and made international.

I was sucking hard at my Lollipop while reliving the events of the last few hours when my good mate Mika, who was visiting from Britain, burst into my living room with a Big Girl in tow. It was clear that Mika was in the dark about the kidnapping when I saw his jaw drop as he digested the news bulletin that was airing on the tube. I quickly filled him in on the happenings. He looked whitewashed and perplexed as my words sank in. I reassured him using his own mantra: to Relax and Take it Easy as I was certain that there would be a Happy Ending to all of this.We decided to call it a night but I hardly had a wink of sleep.Tossing and turning I started to compiled a list of likely suspects in my head.

Well, for one, the Androids (whate’va happened to them?), had always wanted to Do It With Madonna. It made huge sense that they had a palpable motive to kidnap her and shower her with some groupie love, but what would they want with JT? Maybe for him it was a case of being at the right place at the wrong time. Was JT a victim of circumstance?

My next suspect was MJ, as he was a self-confessed Smooth Criminal. The question was: Would he risk such a public stunt just to regain some of the fame that he had once enjoyed?

Knowing what a weirdo he has turned out to be…he would probably not need to wear a mask to hide his face(sic). He would have wanted and in fact he would have savored the public recognition. So, it was highly unlikely that he was the culprit but I would still keep him on the list just because JT had stolen some of his dance moves!Well there you go now! MJ had two pure unadulterated(sic) motives. One: He had a personal vendetta against the dude that stole his moves and, two: He loathed the madonna that stole his spotlight!

Then there was Kylie…She was my number three suspect, not mainly because of motive but because of opportunity. I mean here we were in Australia, where the kidnapping had taken place and it is a fact that Kylie is Australian born and bred so she had the connections and geographic knowledge of the place. She could have used those two resources to organise a kidnapping. In addition, everyone knows she has been arch-rivals with Madonna for yonks. Maybe her sister Danni was in on it too as a part time gig? I was starting to sound delirious…but, “Kylie...,” Now speaking loudly to myself, “... I just Can’t Get You Out of My Head!” But I still had 2 hearts about my suspicions of her.I mean she had just battled cancer and succeed, so needless to say, I had a soft-spot for her…

Suddenly I couldn’t think! I live next door to the kids from Operator Please who were always creating a racket any time of day and now, 3 a.m in the ef***g morning, there was heavy pounding coming from their apartment. It sounded like someone there was playing ping pong (again!!!) Now we know what inspired their “Just A Song About Ping Pong”. A lot has to be said about popular music these days but the long and short of it is : anything goes…

So I nearly asphyxiatemyself using my pillow as I fought a losing battle to sleep.I simply had no peace of mind to afford me some 40 winks.

xox

The next day, a myriad of musicians who were involved in the now dubbed, “Kidnapped Music Tour: Save Marge and JT ”, had gathered at the Transit Hotel in Federation Square in order to give morale support to Marge and JT and to condemn the "act of terrorism". Others were just there to be seen...

By the time I arrived at the venue there was tight security all around and I was let in only because the bouncers recognized my pal Mika who indicated that I was with him.

50 Cent, Jay-z and P. Diddy were the designated spokesmen for the music industry in the matter, not only because they had the Bad Boy image going for them, but also because they were apt business men and they had been appropriated the responsibility to raise the ransom money that would enable the release of Marge and JT. For once in their life they were going to put some of their bodacious lyrics and lame acting skills into practice. The laid back Fi’ddy was currently facing a vicious media who were coming for him left, right and center with 21 questions. P.Diddy, who was notorious for his one liners bailed 50 cent out by drawling out, “Ya’ll know, Mo Money, Mo Problems! No comment.”

Soon, a closed meeting was called for by Madonna’s and JT’s managers and publicists. It was only open for celebrity musicians and their entourage. Mika managed to sneak me in without much drama.Discussions were abuzz with speculation and to make matters more edgy, no word had been heard from the kidnapper(s) yet after the previous day's video of the kidnapping. I overheard Mariah Carey saying to a bunch of other musicians clustered around her that what we really needed was a Hero. Chad Kroger seemed to concur with her as he was nodding his head but Tina (Turner), who by the way was still in great form, retracted, “ C’mon ya'll, We don’t need another hero!”

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(Watch this space as the saga unravels and also for a revised version of this post as it is currently being updated.)

Disclaimer: All scenarios and characters are depicted in a fictional manner for the purposes of fantasy entertainment.Various assumptions have been made and should be overlooked for the pure enjoyment of this article.

Back To The Future Rock Show : 3010

2007-11-20T10:43:00.013+11:00

Correspondence by: The Late Bloomer

of, The Late Bloomer Chronicles

Madd-about-MusicTv (MamTv), is doing it again, hosting yet another intergalactic gig.This time round at the newest, 256^th Playboy Mansion ( just coz it had spare rooms!). The event dubbed “Back to the Future Rock Show: 3010”, is a 72hr- non-stop electrifying, stunt-riddled, mind-blowing event that not only features most of the international rock stars of our time but also showcases quite a number of silicone-enhanced boobs, butts, lips etcetera. Some up-and-coming rock artists such as The Wannabees, The Doormats, The Freak-Show Fanatics, the Machinist Parade, Ricky “Hickie” Blue Band Boys and the Time-Travel-Enthusiasts who have been touring with the ageless actor-turned-singer, Dr. Who, will performed their acts and are only too happy to brush shoulders with big names such as Guns and Roses, U2, Pink Floyd, Red Hot Chilli Peppers, Foo Fighters , Inxs, Madonna, Kylie Minogue and Marilyn Manson.

Highlights of the Event

Friday/ 1^st Day of Gig

Being one of the media correspondents, I am ecstatic to be cruising around with the U2 mob as Bono has always been one of my favorite people and indeed it is bound to be a Beautiful Day!

Bono (aint he the coolest dude ever!) and his crew are still fixated on saving the earth and have just finished yet another Save The Earth Tour, despite the discovery of two more life sustaining planets, Planet Mother Superior and Planet Virgin Springs on which all the world’s population except China has shifted to in the last millennium.

Bono was just drilling in some universal facts into my already saturated head, when a monster Electrical Storm surged our way and blew off his sunnies! Slash, who had rejoined the group Guns and Roses in 2050, was the culprit behind the commotion. He said he got carried away while fine-tuning his guitar for one of their opening acts and it does not help that his guitar looks and performs more like a vacuum cleaner these days. Recovering from the commotion, I fixed my weave as Bono retrieved his sunglasses and we joined the Red Hot Chilli Peppers on Higher Ground.

It was then that James Blunt stepped in, dressed like it was 1973, but that didn’t seem to deter the hot babe who was draped around his arm, with a t-shirt written Simone on her voluminous bust. In a recent interview by the Rolling Stone Magazine, Blunt had confessed that he had always fancied himself as the fifth member of the Beatles…What a Day Tripper!

Moving on, lots of bands are still arriving at the mansion and I made a good excuse to go out and puff some fresh air, as Bono of U2 is becoming such a pain with his earth talk, I had to scatter! Knowing that he has Vertigo (the fear of heights), I took to the roof-top!

As I strolled through the mansion on my way there, I saw Marylin Manson at a corner singing about The Beautiful People, who he clearly was not! But you gotta hand it to him, he is a genius of some sort, having managed to successively curve an untouchable alter ego that is a far cry from the geek that he is! I am silently wondering who the hell did his make-up?!, when the madness that is Manson, suddenly bursts into a mess of tears and mascara. Looks like the dude is still hurting from his Tainted Love, even though Deta Von Teese had ditched him several centuries back…Who would have thought he had heart?

The re-incarnation of Madonna (What else is new?)

On the rooftop I find Madonna, who is still looking very virginal and this time round she has somehow convinced some of her die-hard fans that she is the physical reincarnation of some Indian goddess. In the meantime she has generated a huge following, a handful of who are on the rooftop with her, chanting some obscure gibberish that is inertly part of her performance these days. Oddly enough some of her followers are known to literally hold Confessions on the Dance Floor! Sadly, her groupies still believe that she is still Like A Virgin down there, since she only adopts her kids from time immemorial! Fact is, the Androids still want to Do It With Madonna!

The Nutters

After getting some fresh air, I realize that I have a shiny nose(blame it on the DNA). So I have to powder my nose in the ladies... God bless the inventor of talcum powder! Although it is not the opportune time or place for an interview, I try my luck with p!nk who I find there. Just as I tap her shoulder for an introduction, she turns and barks at me, “ Leave Me Alone, don’t you see that am having Conversations with my 13 year old self?” I am left utterly flabbergasted as she continues talking to the mirror...

Just as I leave the ladies, while thinking that things couldn’t get weirder, I find Kate Heidke-Miller on stage shrieking about some French Psycho-killer. Leaves you wondering why some rock stars are not in the loony bin…but stranger things have been known to happen. Just blame it on Californication as the Red Hot Chilli Peppers would say, “If you want these kind of dreams…its Californication!”

Speaking of eccentric characters, Bjork is in the house! But this time she tells me that she is only there to study Human Behaviour and not shriek* (sic) sing…uh huh…Right! As you were Bjork...

I catch up with the ever gorgeous, Kylie Minogue who is in readiness to perform after the psycho-shrieker, Kate heidke-Miller, and manage to get some gossip about her love life. It is all over the grapevine that she has yet again left her long-term boo, Olivier (this time for good or so she says), but her Body Language is clearly saying something else …Well I guess, Better the Devil You Know, Kylie…

Next, I catch up with the artist formerly known as Prince, who is seated aloof at a corner, amusing himself. I can’t put a finger on whether he is a boy or a girl today, because his Sexuality has always been a mystery to me…but my questions are put to rest when he approaches me after he noticed that I was staring and says, “ You are the most beautiful girl in the world!” Apparently, as I was later told, that was his oldest pick up line…but after a few minutes of establishing that I aint his Future Baby Mama, he tells me that he intends to move to New New York(not a typo) since he reckons, ‘All the critics love you in New York!”

Its already midnight now, and the place feels like Canned Heat. I overhear Jamiroquai telling his Cosmic Girl that the air-conditioning has broken down since someone had rewired the cables for their electric guitar…(Oh dear! Slash of Guns n' Roses must be really proud of himself!)

Anyway, as the convertible roof is being opened to let in some fresh air, I get a lucky interview with Jamiroquai. He is currently a Space Cowboy and has his own reality show titled the same that is touring the galaxy. He tells me that when he met his Cosmic Girl, it was love at first sight but later confesses that, “She laser beamed me with her cosmic eyes!”

Well, seems I need to get myself a cosmic boy…sounds kinky!

As Friday night gives in to Saturday morning I am totally spent and smashed after having 10 shots of Hot Tequilla Brown with Jamiroquai and his girl.

I stumble blindly to bed...

Gone Are The Days...Phew!

2007-07-09T17:01:00.000+10:00

Pic 1. Structure of the standard high school latrine.(This one looks even more structurally secure than the ones in my old high school!)

Pic. 2 Inside a standard high school pit latrine.

Like some (or most) of you, I hated my high school experience. From the snobby prefects (branded cops) to the shady pit latrines that we used for toilets in between class breaks since the dorms where under lock and key: so that students could not sneak back into the dorms for a mid-day siesta, after a lunch time meal that consisted of half-done ugali (made from maize flour) and a piece of cabbage that floated in a plate of luke warm water ( the stew in this case!) that left you feeling heavy-eyed and blotted.

It is the pit latrines that traumatized me the most and without them in the picture I might have actually tried to have a good high school experience! I occasionally still have nightmares* of those lats. (latrines) 5 years down the lane.

I usually find myself squatting butt-nekkid in one of those latrines and the next thing I know the flimsy excuse of a floor gives in and I find myself falling into an abyss of darkness. It is when I wake up in a sweat that I realise I was only having a bad dream.

The problem with our high school latrines is that they were not bottomless pits. In fact you could easily see the contents of peoples lunches without straining too much into the hole: This was of course with the help of the stream of light that you got into the latrine by leaving the door slightly ajar so that you would “aim into the hole” or rather “not miss”! But then again you were faced with another moral dilemma; While trying to aim into the hole, you were left with no choice but to look into it and see all sorts of colours congealing with each other and of course the acrid smell of the wee always hit you stack in the face: sometimes it rose up like vapour fumes from the hole right into the fabric of your school uniform: hence most of us would strip our sweaters before we entered the pits!

The size of the standard pit: 1m x 1m (and sometimes smaller…you wonder what was with the mincing of space because most pits were always surrounded by large stretches of land with knee-high savannah grass and no other buildings were built nearby ( mostly because of the pungent smell that emanated from the latrines.

The standard high school latrine was mostly always a slab of concrete with a rectangular or square hole in the middle (big enough to swallow your leg in!) with corrugated iron walls and roof with a wooden door made of rough sawn timber planks joined roughly together with unconcealed nails.You were lucky to find a latrine door that had a knob, more less one that could close! As for the corrugated metal, it was mostly rustic, corroded mainly by the fumes that emanated from the pit.

In the standard high school latrine: no tissue was provided. You had to carry your own or suffer the consequences!

It was even worse in the wet season because then the pits would fill up with rain water and spew out most of their contents onto the surrounding ground. Only then did the school administration think of the latrines as hazardous! After a few months, when the rain had relented and the “contents” settled back into place the school admin. would then declare the pits safe to use, without much repair work done!

In short, our high school latrines were an accident waiting to happen.

As I said before: the latrine space was tight. The only movement you could make freely was when you squatted down to align hole with hole and when you stood up after you finished your business. The rest of the locomotion required specialized skills as you navigated your way into and out of the latrine. Some students made it look so easy: the ducking in and out of the latrine,I mean…

And then talk about the mess some people left the latrine in after using them. Eish!I remember we used to say, “ Watch out for that loo , someone has decorated it!” Manze those toilets were hell on earth!

But on the other hand I have come up with a conspiracy theory about the whole Latrine System business in my former high school. It was there to instill some sense of discipline in us.

No student had the time to waste in a man-hole type of environment; hence there was very little or no graffiti penciled or marked onto the walls and door.But then again it did limit our creativity inside the toilet! The other thing is no one could dare smoke a fag in the latrines because it was a matter of using them out of necessity- a duck in, duck out affair or rather a less-than-one-minute affair- so woe unto you if you were constipated!
The art of Self-control was also instilled by default. I remember many are the times that I held my bladder-about-to-bust until the time when the dorm toilets were actually available for use rather than use the pits from hell!

Personally I think convicts in western countries get better social amenities then we did in high school!

Then, there was a kind of chaste system in high school were everyone was ranked according to the role or duty they did. On top of the list were the prefects(or cops), then rest of the student community was classed according to the school duties they did: there were the library workers, the dining hall workers, the chapel workers, the dormitory workers and lastly there were the latrine workers. You were made to feel like the lowest of the lowest if you were a latrine worker and mostly this role was given as a sort of punishment. In other cases cops assigned the prettiest girls, or the more wealthy girls such menial jobs just to bring them down. Woe to you if you were not “well connected” with the cops.

So that’s it! Something about my high school experience. It would be interesting to hear what other funny experiences people had in high school.

The Ettamogah Pub

2007-07-08T23:08:00.001+10:00

The Ettamogah is literally a pub straight out of a comic book! This pub was a direct blueprint from the pages of Ken Maynard's cartoon series that was featured in Australian and New Zealand Post Magazines. It was built in 1989 and remains one of Southern Australia's Icons. It is the most photographed pub in the world.

Here are some photos I took of the Ettamogah Pub this weekend on my trip back from Sydney.

Pic.1 Front Elevation

Pic. 2 Cartoon Image from which the quirky building form was adopted.

Pic 3. The Ettamogah Pub behind me.

Inside ,the Ettamogah Pub is filled with more cartoon strips by Ken Maynard, and mostly written in Australian Vernacular( read Bush Language). Most of the inside walls are graffiti-ed by lots of stick on paper snippets scribbled on by tourists who wanted to "leave their mark" at the Ettamogah. Others just stick their business cards on a huge column in the foyer.
The building itself is quite large and not a quirky small crawl-in.
This was one of my highlights on my weekend trip to Sydney!

On My Birthday Eve...

2007-06-06T11:48:00.000+10:00

Yap, yet another year has passed and am a little bit older and wiser than I was last year a time like this...kids grow fast I tell you and the beautiful ones are yet to be born... Like most of you am pretty content with the time of year that I was born in and 7 has always been considered a lucky number by most...so I reckon am a lucky person in one way or another. So to celebrate this day with all my friends and family both close and those far and away, I saw it appropriate to dig up some photos from my hay days and share them with ya'll. This little lass was quiet a dynamite in her early days...I wonder what happened? hmm... I guess she grew up!

Me and my mum...I was about a year old.
Note the size of that biscuit!

Me at 2 years: I think my first solo studio portrait. I did my parents proud!

I think this has gotta be one of my kodak moments! I was 2 going on 3 and very, very mischievous!

What a smile!

Me at 6 I think.

ASTROLOGICAL FACT

"Gemini is bored easily and feels uncomfortable in an enclosed environment. Naturally bright and alert, they use a good vocabulary and enjoy learning for its own sake. Gemini has a retentive memory for facts and languages. They may skim the surface of whatever is being studied but they cover a wide territory. Easy talker, Gemini sometimes stretches the truth to make a good story. They prefer to do more than one thing at a time, but they need to learn to finish what they start."

Happy World Environment Day (WED)

2007-06-05T17:46:00.000+10:00

Today, in the spirit of World Environmental Day, I decided to take some photos of the nature that surrounds me. It being autumn and all, I am always enchanted by the orange tinge that some of the trees acquire during this time of year and the heaps of orange that blankets the ground when those leaves fall.

I took these beautiful pictures at my Uni. grounds.

[Click the images for larger views.]

An Ode to Mother Nature!

I loved the lemony shade of this tree.

...of oranges, greens and yellows...and the brick building at the background adds to the whole ensemble of vibrant colours that make up for a cloudy day!

I think the bike rider with his orange jacket added a bit of spice to this picture.

Still getting there...The colours seem to be ripening as autumn reaches its full bloom.

Click here for 77 ways to celebrate WED from the UNEP website.

7 things about Jo

2007-05-12T18:12:00.000+10:00

1.I care about what people (will) think.

This is one of the bad aspects that I am really trying hard to shake off and sometimes I tend to do the opposite and do stuff regardless of what people think or want. And that makes it even worse coz then I end up giving them something to talk about. Bottom line is...I hate it when I feel forced to comply to what others want...but sometimes its a means to an end, and thats when I have to swallow my pride...

2.I am an escapist.

Yes, I have to own up to this. I always find myself procrastinating or doing something else " that is more fun, than what I am supposed to be doing.Example, I am blogging right now, when there are a million other things that I should be doing...like working on my 3d model on skecth-up, or drafting my plans, sections, elevations and perspectives or that 2500 word essay on architectural theories that's due in 2weeks time and I haven't even started on the research!
See, that right there is escapism and am a class -act extermist when it comes to it, but jeez, give a girl a break!Its not last minute yet...see another one of my flaws...

3.Coz I got high...

Now like the Aegeus, I get high on music, even without having had any fuel (pints) to precipitate it.Most of the time when I go out clubbing, I will be the ice -breaker on the dance floor and katika like there is no tomorrow. The best experience I have had so far is this one time when I got to the dance floor and there was house music and rock playing and I just got this humongous music connection with some white dude and we chucked moves for each other that left everyone on the floor gasping for more. At the end of the night we thanked eached other for such a whole-some random experience. I tell you, I can only sum it up as priceless! , and it wasn't even about g.r.i.n.d.i.n.g...,though there was a lot of energy in the air fit to ignite a small fire!

4.I hate gossips.

Everyone who knows me knows that I hate vybing about other people. But I love talking about myself! Am sure that doesn't count. Hakuna kitu kaa gossiping about ya-self au?!

5.I love to keep a low profile.

Like most people, I have an inner wild-child that is always fighting to be unleashed, but those who know me well enough, know that I also like keeping a low profile. This is because I sometimes can be mistaken for being a bit big-headed...lakini when you are a pro like that...i guess you can't help it!But seriously, I try to,...very hard.

6.I refrain from judging people too fast.

I don't judge people by first-impressions.This is a good thing, but sometimes I have been taken for a ride*(seen as gullible) by some people who think that I don't know what they are up to.When their actions start speaking louder than their words, I duly bail out!

7.Philosophy that I live by: I am a work in progress...

As a teenager, I never fully appreciated myself.I had deep self-esteem issues which made me shy away from interactions, or even stand up for myself. But with time all that has changed, and although am still not too outspoken, I know that am a force to reckon with in my own calm and collected premise.I read in between the lines and most of the time I am prudent.

@ Aegeus: You only asked for 7; you only get what you ask for!

Boys Vs. Men and a Little Free-Spiritism

2007-05-07T09:20:00.000+10:00

This is one of those posts where the pre-conceived ideas are a little murky so its just gonna have to find itself as it unwinds.You know some people are also like that in this day and age, and isn't it a sad affair coz just seem to flow with whatever's happening, go where the wind blows and all- by the way am not talking about free-spirited peeps, at least they know what their purpose in life is! Free-spirits make it their goal to live their life un-inhibited by any kind of constraints and without any moral obligations.-wiki.
One of my girl-friends dropped one of her dudes the other day because he was one of those dudes who was constantly undecisive and always left it up to other people to make up his mind for him. He was not a man, but just a boy...his social life revolved around the boys, they dictated how his day was going to unwind, meanwhile his chille was over there left hanging in the cold.He never usually ever came up with any social activity that was meant to involve only the two of them...so with that said...dude was dropped despite his desperate pleas of, ' I'll change....'
This reminds me of John Legend's song, I can change.." especially these lines,

I'll give up all the places I used to go

Stay out the club

Stay home because I'm with you

I'll give up all those girls that I used to know

They don't compare

Baby I swear it's the truth (you know it's the truth baby)

So I'm through with the women

Yeah that's right.I give up on the pimpin'

Girl I'm gonna repent from my sinnin'

If that's what you want me to do

I'll get right if you want it

Go to church

Get baptized if you want it

Girl you opened my eyes and I'm gonna

Be much better for you

Baby believe me

Well, the truth of the matter is, a guy can change only if he wants to and not just coz someone else wants him to...so, no matter how good his chic looks like, or how mind-blowing the shag is...he will only change for her if he really loves her.

I also believe that there is always that particular person that's meant for someone, not soulmate, but just their ideal companion...and when they find each other...the world seems to make more sense.

Anyway that aside, and I don't wanna come off as some bitter bitch...but I have refer to "Like A Boy"... on the sole basis that am feeling this ngoma for its bomping, and ciara looks so sa-waah!

Like A Boy Lyrics:

Wish we could switch up the roles

And I could be that...

Tell you I love you

But when you call I never get back

Would you ask them questions like me?...

Like where you be at?Cause I'm out 4 in the morning

On the corna rolling, Doing my own thing...Ohh

What if I?...Had a thing on the side?

Made ya cry?

Would the rules change up?...

Or would they still apply?...

If I played you like a toy?...

Sometimes I wish I could act like a boy.

-courtesy of lyricsondemand.com

Now that I don't wanna leave the "boys" thinking that this was pure hateration...

I will leave you with a capture of luuuvvvvvvvvvv, and peace!

As I digress much further, coz I can feel some dudes preparing ammo coz of this post, I just found out that I have only 6.16Gb of music to brag about while one of my "buddies", The Aegeus was recently boasting about his "100Gb and still growing collection of music." Naskia ka-waruuuuuu!

Enyewe, am spell-bound. When I kuja back to Kenya, I'm a girl with a mi-shoni: to INVADE your itunes music and 'nyak' all the tunes it has to offer! Aegeus...you have been warneD!

Then again to add insult to injury, I have all the crappy songs the Sister Scissors (band-name derived from a sex-style!) , have to offer to the world, except the one that I love listening to on radio, I don't feel like dancing...

So itunes, here I come! Doo-di-la-ding!

Therapy only a (vertically challenged) shrink can offer!

2007-04-23T20:37:00.000+10:00

Bethany: "Having a greater appreciation of who and what you are.Am not offended."
-Bethany Horowitz, Boston Legal.

So now the other day I was forced to have a talk with my shrink before the circumstances in my life push me over the edge and right into a loonie bin. I had missed a couple of sessions and my shrink wasn't too pleased with my lack of manners for not being courteous enough to call and cancel.
By the way my shrink lives in the miasma that is called BLACK FEMALE BRAIN...in a purple-velvety sound proof chamber that is only furnished with two humongous leather seats in the middle and small coffee table that always has two glasses of water on top of it, that are always half full... This is her attempt at being minimalistic.
My shrink is my alter ego, Late Bloomer. She is also known to have travelled all over the world and has shook hands, and wined and dined the RICH AND THE FAMOUS.Apart from writing a thesis on human behaviour and its peculiarities, plus several best-seller books on human psychology...She is also currently writing her Late Bloomer's Travel Chronicles.But that is a story for another day... did I tell you that she is a midget? Yep.
Today I had this appointment with her at 3.00pm sharp. I was the last patient scheduled for her to see.One haughty look at me over her thick ebony rimmed glasses and she knew things were thick. She could not fathom a 1hr session with me after having dealt with so many loonies today but she had her solution...
By the way you can't tell that she is not so enthusiastic about her job as she is always nodding avidly as the loonie(in this case, me) speaks their mind and pours their heart out to her...until the day I found out that she was nodding her way to deep slumber! So i figured she sticks to the job for the quick buck...an easy $500/hr earned and all she has to offer in the end is a quick summary of your life and ask you how you intend to solve your problems. See...no sweat! I figure it is for the same reason Miss Bloomer hasn't sent me to the bin yet...its all about the money, and money makes the world go round you know...
So now, how to solve my problems? That's the part I hate most...b'coz then I have to think. You know I haven't ever been a good problem solver, my mathematics is very rusty, and that's why my life is such a mess. And then agen I could always jump a cliff...but that was Alfie's solution to his problems and we never could see eye to eye in anything...so in that case am not jumping a cliff...especially not the same cliff he made a leap to his death from.(Alfie was my good friend, best friend, only friend.)
Did I tell you that I was there when he decided to jump? Now, you know my life is fucked up,but that's not even a drop of it! His lasts words as he took the giant leap into the after-life were,
"AM COMIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNG!", and I swear to you that was the first time I saw him get an erection! He believed in re-incanation... That he was to be an African Prince in the next life...
Nway back to the plot. One way or another, speaking to my shrink does offer me some solace.She doesn't offer solutions...just a half-listening ear.So now someone is wondering why the hell I have to pay 500bucks an hr for someone to listen to me...don't I have friends?You wonder. See, all my friends except Alfie(R.I.P) are in the loonie bin already...and you guessed it...courtesy of moi!(mwaah)
People say I am a grumpy person, but look at the world around you and there is so much to be unhappy about.There is global warming, kids shooting each other in schools, people humping each other around...(I dont get much sex,by the way.)
They also say that I am very trivial (a.k.a petty). So that makes me what? A petty grump?
Anyway if you ask me...am just a realist.Kwanza for that 500/hr session...there should be at least a pretty face sitting at the reception...instead I am greeted by a shoe that "talks like a fish and has the personality of a goat." Now you see why am grumpy?
Anyway, that's it for now people. You were very mistaken if you thought I would divulge the details of my session with my shrink.Thats a storo is very privileged and confidential material save for another day when I can at least laugh at my situation.For now BOSTON LEGAL beacons.
Gotta Love Denny Crane!

St Pauls Church

2007-02-05T10:07:00.000+11:00

Federation Square

2007-02-04T18:31:00.000+11:00

With its brightly coloured concrete lawn and steps, Federation Square or FedSQ as many Melbournians refer to it, is a unique public space designed by the Labarchitects. FedSQ is a conglomeration of sharply-angled, odd-looking buildings that seem to scream out loud for attention: LOOK AT ME! This desire for attention is even more pronounced when you contrast FedSQ to its surrounding buildings...that is the St Pauls which is of the Medieval Gothic Style and Flinder's Station which has Classical bearings.

From endless adoration from its fans to the seamless ridicule generated by its critiques , FedSQ is indeed a bold architectural step in defining what public space means in the modern city and its inhabitants.

Personally, I think FedSQ's only salvation is that it is located "right smack in the centre" of the Melbourne CBD and therefore at some point both visitors and locals find themselves quizzed by its presence. Its architecture that you simply can't chose to ignore. Its simlply: Confrontational.

click on images for larger views!

Flinder's Station

2007-02-04T18:10:00.000+11:00

Late Bloomer's Travel Chronicles, Part II

2007-01-29T19:54:00.000+11:00

7.30am: Luda and I had Breakfast at Tiffany's and I loved the whole ambiance of the place especially the Deep Blue Something fake leather seats on which I cushioned my tushie as i heartily attacked the food.I was knackered to say the least but on the way back to the hotel, Luda had a mad craving for a Milkshake and suggested that we hit Kelis' Milk Bar. Inwardly I knew it was his last attempt at getting a 'quick-fix' hook up as he had been devastatingly unsuccessful the previous night.And it was local common knowledge that at Kelis' you could get more than your fair share of milkshake. Infact it came in an impressive range of containers if you get my drift!
So I did not object as I myself needed some Sugar Coated Iced Tea to numb the nauseous beckonings of a hangover.
So, sure as day, Luda managed to secure himself a 'date' as I saw a Brazillian looking mamasita with a lovely tan gesturing to him, Call me sometime...infact, ANYTIME!" I knew she wouldn't last a night in his little black book...
So back at the 5star Hotel where T.I. and a host of other hiphop artists were staying, we got the Blue Carpet Treatment and were staying next door to Snoop Dog. He is definitely one lanky dude, more so in real life but he is cool.
First things first. I decided to hit the bubble bath before Luda even had the slightest notions of de-consecrating it, if you know what I mean...I locked the door behind me for good measure as he blacked out on his bed.
Ah! This was the life! All I wanted, I got at the snap of my fingers...Pass the Courvoisier, and am sure the Busta Rhymes look-a-like waiter would have licked my toes if I demanded it!
So, after a couple of hours of a much needed beauty sleep, I was awoken by Luda who had somehow locked himself out of our room. I was sure he had been chasing the housekeeping up and down the hotel coridoors when that happened. I knew him so well despite himself.
Anyway, tonight we had major plans to hit the A town for the second night and this time we had Omarion and 50cent as part of our Entourage.
I was so feeling Omarion but he always seemed to have this long-legged super fly lass on tow. However, this did not deter me.In any case I was even more reeled in by the fact that he "kept high standards." Inwardly I longed for him to whisper to me, "She is fine too, but I want you..."
I would be totally taken!
So,I was day-dreaming about his chiselled out torso and me up against it....when my gal Mary J Blige hollered at my cell and asked, "What's the 411?"
Apparently B(Beyonce) was unleashing her new debut album B'day at a cool new joint up town and 'everyone' was gonna be there.
I could hear the words of the song Dilemma by Kelly Rowland and Nelly chimming in the background...as I was now faced with my own little dilemma but after weighing the odds I decided to go for the better option: Omarion! Plus I wasn't particularly keen to watch B's writhing and high-pitched performances tonight.What I needed was some T.L.C...
So after much unheeded coaxing from Mary J Blige, she gave up and jokingly told me that I'm Going Down for dissing her tonight. But the thought of hooking up with Omarion was a high by itself!

to be continued...

Read Part I of the sequel Here

Off-the-cuff: Don't you just hate it when your computer decides to heat up and shut down on you? Made me re-write this whole post again because I forgot to save it.

Dedicated to 4X-ian class of 2002

2007-01-28T14:33:00.000+11:00

Jeez! Its been four damn good years since I graduated from high school and I must say, as I reminisce...that those were pretty darn good days,thanks to my classmates and some teachers who never ceased to amuse.

I remember our English teacher, who we all had a love-hate relationship with during the four years in that hole.
One day she steps into the classroom and quips, "There is an air in this class.(!)"
And everyone bursts out laughing, thinking that she was referring to the foul smelling atmosphere [courtesty of Sus the pus, Mad Mags and Gaks who had firmly secured their rightful place as the Professional Farters and Burpers a.k.a PFBs of our class... ]Little did we know we had just triggered an avalanche of misunderstandings... This was definately not one of those light moments we could laugh off...The T.A. was mad as a red hot poker and fumed out of class.The silence that descended the classroom after that scenario was as loud as murder.!
Then after a few, she comes back to class and tells us that we were very condescending individuals and that some of us(referring to the Back-Benchers, a.k.a BBs , particularly)...instilled unspoken fear in others... (blame it on the quarter system of school selection that made the monetary divide so obvious...)
So later, the class realises that this is her very complicated and psychologically gruelling approach of telling us that we are indeed the bitches of bitches for not answering the questions that she directs to the class in general...Drama, drama,drama!
So that was basically as ugly as it could get...English lessons were never the same again...not under such psychological duress...but we still got our A class average in the subject at the end of the day! (Kula hiyo!) FYI, clearly am still traumatised!
On a much lighter note, I loved Oral Literature times, esp. reading the book, "Looking for a Rain God." (Click on link for an oral narration of the short story: "Looking for a Rain God"!).

From whence we coined ourselves, "The Class of Wolofs" (...and many wolves in sheeps' clothing we were!) ...
And our catch phrase? "Your-self-o!"...in faked Pigin English....brutally directed towards anyone, all-in- unison,whenever they acted like an arse or just asked a "dumb" question... (there's something about mob psychology that boosts the confidence of cowards!)

Jeez!Memories...

Halloween Joke

2007-01-27T15:27:00.000+11:00

Overheard during preparation for a past Halloween Party.

Boy A: I haven't got a clue to what I should dress up as...Any ideas?

Boy B: Why don't you just come dressed in your pants alone and topless.

Boy A: The point being?...

Boy B: If anyones asks you, just say you are a pre-mature ejaculation that came in your pants!

-------------------------------------------------------

Quote of the Day:

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Late Bloomer's Travel Chronicles

2007-01-25T12:25:00.000+11:00

We were Pimping All Over The World with Ludacris and found ourselves seated next to the O’jays in the Love Train. Apparently the whole Jackson's famo was there too coz they were headed to Janet Jackson’s opening gig for her latest album the 20 Y.0. and I could tell that she was looking forward to it because she was acting So Excited! It was obvious that she was estatic because she was all nippy(no pun intended!) and snuggling next to her boo, Jermaine Dupri who had his I “Gotta Get it” look perfected…and kept on saying Damita Jo or my bad…was it “damn it Jo?”you know these miros have that deep lingo going on…so anyway…I spot Andre and Antwan “Big Boy” Patton of Outkast heading our way on the aisle…they were looking a bit Tipsy and J’kwon gave them a momentary disgusted look before he continued darting the hot Mexican chic sitted next to him…if only he knew she was Santana’s daughter Maria na kweli alikuwa under 18…he would have thought twice about throwing darts her way. So anyway…I think the pint got the best of Andre…and he happened to spill one of his drinks on Janet’s bossoms as he passed …I don’t know how but it just happened…so anyway the dudes had to apologize profusely…Andre kept on repeating…Am sorry Miss Jackson…so now am stuck with that song on my head even though right now am at Janet’s concert coz enyewe we decided to take a detour with Luda to Atlanta where Janet’s gig is happening. And anyway Luda was like..”ATL is my kinda “Area code” *bitches…so we had to stop over.
I saw Big Boi backstage , a bit sober now, as he was handing Janet some red Roses in apology for his mate's , Andre, misdemeanor in the train. I could tell that he was still feeling bad about the whole thing…esp. since Janet Jackson was still recovering from her world famous faux pas in the super Bowl performance with Justin Timberlake.Talk about the devil…I spotted Justin Timberlake at some corner katiang the same under -18 lale thinking that that “Senorita” vibe of his would work…Enyewe that lale was hot like Wow!? Mya was feeling a bit outshined by Santana’s daughter tonight...and if Buba Sparxx had seen her he would have definitely given her the Miss New Booty award…y lie!So moving forward…Janet was up onstage doing her thing and everything was running on smoothly to the t....!I brushed shoulders with all sorts of celebrities. Kanye West was sitted in his stunnas, and mind you it was dark, and next to him was a chic who just fitted the perfect definition of a Gold Digger…she looked a bit too old for his taste…lakini this is the High School Drop-out we are talking about…so I guess he is allowed!
Finally, Kelis is Here with Nas her hubby and she was feeling kinda Bossy. When Nas’eyes locked with J-zay’s (who also happened to be present)… J-zay just brushed the metaphorical ‘Dirt off his shoulder” and whispered something to his boo, Beyonce…who was apparently Fighting Temptation not to give akina Kelis one of her Nasty Girl look.Right about now Luda was craving some Southern Fried chicken and so we had to bail to the nearest KFC coz enyewe …I was feeling hungry too…plus the concert was getting boring…coz all Janet ever says is the word baby…and her dance routines have become sort of mundane these days lakini we had given her enough support for the night. Luda was so hungry and I heard him tell some chic,"Move Bitch, get out the way!"…I told him he needed to show a bit more of that "Southern Hospitality" but he retorted back that I was becoming a "Growing Pain."So anyway…after the KFC after sijui How Many Licks with Lil Kim who we had found there…we stepped out of the place and we had not really made up our minds on whether or not we wanted to go back to Janet’s Concert, when what’d ya know who shows up cruising in his Lamborghini?…Lil Jon came out holding some real Crunk Juice and invited us over to check out his new found Lover and Friend…(for the slow ones…he was referring to his Lamborghini!) It was Yellow, but I was really surprised to find that he was listening to a Coldplay CD! That was pretty surprising… considering this is Lil Jon we are talking about. So anyway he must have seen my perplexed look and changed the CD…and had us all Snapping Our Fingers to some sawa crunk tunes. While we were still there trying to get a timam plot for the rest of the night Mya showed up in her Mustang and told us that one of Janet’s dancers had Fallen vibaya and that they had stopped the concert momentarily…so now she was here to grab some fast food as well coz she was not a Sophisticated Lady!I told Mya that Lil Kim was there too stuffing her face coz she was sure she wasn’t gonna get fast food in jail. (Remember Lil Kim’s Case…she was currently appealing for leniency for Perjury.). So anyway, Mya and Lil Kim probably needed to reminisce on their Lady Marmalade days so we left that place and decided to hit the club for a Jump Off. As Lil John put it…lets Get Low…but the only thing that was low was his ride. We were all busy sipping some of that crunk juice he had stashed on the back seat and I can’t remember Cauz i got High…but surely…Afro-man was in the ride…or just some guy who had an uncanny resemblance to him. Anyway it was just me, Luda, Lil Jon and that Afro guy..in the ride.So we fika the hottest Club in town coz ati we had Lil’ Wayne was performing and I couldn’t help but wonder why everyone had the title Lil’ infront of their names these days.So we din't need to Stand Up there waiting in line coz heck, I was with Luda and the rest…so the bouncers let us step in. As we were checking in some white chic who looked like Fergie of the Black eyed peas telling her boo to Shut Up and the guy was like hunny… I Don’t Lie to you!
Men! Me and Luda were feeling too Woozy by this time but the pint kept on flowing our way courtesty of Lil Jon…dang that guy doesn’t ever get high or what?! I guess it’s just the grills he has in his mouth…maybe they dissolve the alcohol in his mouth before it hits his system. I was starting to think loosely .I had to go take a pee…
It was when I entered the ladies’ toilets that I realized that this joint was too popular with well known musicians…coz in there was Tboz and Chilli of T.L.C. bitching about some Scrubs and heck those Girls Talk! Tboz was like she would rather “Touch myself” than settle for a “Quickie”…at that point I stopped listening to their vibe coz enyewe…
Then guess who burges into the Ladies all Teary Eyed…Missy Elliot…and she brushed off some chic to the side and said, “Let Me Fix My Weave!” I could tell she had been involved in a fight recently…and I had missed it all! Anyway, so I entered one of the loos…it smelt so good in there and the floor work was exquisitely done that I was momentarily transfixed and forgot to close the door…so as am doing my biz…when Monica burged in on me!..we were both so embarrassed…but she backed off quickly and when I was done I found her outside and she told me, “Don’t take it Personal.” I was like it was my fault coz I had not closed the door. Tboz and Chilli were still there and now talking about some dude they were referring to as the Creep. God! that vibe was too interesting…I took my time washing my hands and straightening myself out, trying hard not to look like I was eaves-dropping.It was then Brandy ingiad the ladies' and just then Monica chucked from using the loo. Those two gals still had issues…I could tell, coz the tension in there was so thick, it was asphyxiating. So anyway they were trying act civil with each other but I heard Brandy utter, “The Boy (is still) Mine”, under her breathe. But Monica was So Gone…she had even forgotten to wash her hands after using the loo!(yuk!)
I was just finishing up when Pink entered the ladies…I knew I had to bail from there coz that gal…is one bundle of Trouble.! But the lale looked a bit bumped out and just dashed into one of the loos and I could tell from the sounds...(and smell) emanating from in there that things were not so good with her.This continued for like 5 gory minutes …the smell was enough to chase us away from there but she sounded like she was in major anguish and everyone’s had their eyes wide open and noses pinched shut! At one point I almost laughed but tried hard to stifle the laugh. So like another minute passed and then Pink chucks from the loo and to our surprise she screams… “LET’S GET THIS PARTY STARTED!!!” I had no words for her.I just chucked from there hoping that I was still smelling good.!

Just because you indicate...

2007-01-21T15:23:00.000+11:00

Just because you indicate doesn't mean you are heading in the right direction.Just because you want to make a move doesn't mean that it will work.You need well laid out plans and understanding of the consequences. _Justin Herald - Australian Motivational Speaker and Entrepreneur.

Ponder This...

2007-01-21T15:04:00.000+11:00

Illustration work- by Joan

My Mistakes

2007-01-18T23:27:00.000+11:00

Well as a young adult woman who is more or less hormone driven as her age would allow...I have to admit I have made a couple of mistakes when it comes to choosing the guys in my life and then today I stumbled onto this great piece of advice that I would like to share with all women who will be lucky enough to stumble upon my blog.

10 Mistakes Women Make With Men:

MISTAKE #1: Betting Your Love Life On His “Potential”

Do you know any women who want the man they're dating to behave differently? Of course you do.
And just like me, I'm sure you have friends who date guys who don't have much going for them or who don't treat them very well. Somehow these women always have an excuse for the guy's shortcomings.What's going on here? It's actually very simple.Women (and men) don't base their choices of men on how “nice” or “good” someone is to them day-to-day. Women choose the men they do because they feel a powerful GUT LEVEL ATTRACTION for them.And guess what?Some women will continue to put up with a guy that doesn't treat them very well. Sometimes for months or years...But why in the world would a woman do that!?Well, to put it simply, they confuse the strong attraction they feel for the guy with a deeper “connection”. Women who do this are doomed to end up in failed relationships with the “wrong” guys.How do I know?Because I've seen it at least a hundred times...And because I've been this guy in the past myself. Thinking back on past dating and relationships I've had, I was selfish and didn't offer much. I'm amazed the women put up with me. But they did...all the while hoping that I would somehow change. The women I dated hoped I'd change.The only thing they saw in me that led them to want to keep me around was the “potential” they saw in me to share my feelings and communicate with them. The potential for something better and the potential for me to change and be a better lover, boyfriend, companion or whatever...The truth was, I was hopelessly bad at these things at the time.And more importantly, I wasn't even at a place in my life where I knew how to or was interested in developing a deep and committed relationship - with ANYONE. But deep down these women believed that if they tried hard enough, that it would make up for what was lacking. They believed that I could become someone else with them.... and that this would be easy for us both. Talk about a losing battle. It doesn't make a lot of “logical” sense... But until you accept that lots of women do this AND that YOU could be doing it on some level, you'll NEVER have the success with men that you choose and want.MISTAKE

#2: Assuming You “Get” Men & Their Psychology

Men are different from women. You need to accept this fact, and deal with it. When a woman sees a man, she can very quickly pick apart certain things about his style, body language, status and character that will tell her all kinds of things about him. Lots of women don't even consciously see that they do this because the process is so obvious and simple for them. But does the same apply for men?As you probably already know, men are generally more visual. As a result, they often don't understand non-verbal communication as well as women. And men often lack what women have in emotional awareness and “intuition”. Women don't seem to remember this about men.So do men feel sexually attracted to w0men based just on looks? Or is something else going on? Well, after studying this topic for years now, and talking to thousands of men and women, I can tell you that men have their “attraction mechanisms” triggered by things OTHER than looks. Especially when it comes to longer term relationships. Looks just happen to be the most obvious way... But looks are NOT the most powerful.If you know how to use your body language AND communication correctly, you can make men feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that YOU feel when you see that hot, great looking guy that you got to know. But it's not an accident. You have to LEARN how to do this. And ANY woman can learn how...

MISTAKE #3: Pretending To Be Something For A Man

In the desire to please a man, women are constantly doing things to get a man's attention, to get him to like them or to make him more attracted or in love with them. Another HORRIBLE idea. Lots of women mistakenly think that doing unusual things to try and get a guys attention will make him magically see what a great catch they are and want to be with them.Wrong.Men YOU TRULY WANT are never attracted to the types of women who kiss up to them, make weak plays for affection or complain to get what they want... EVER. Don't get me wrong here. Things like being sexy for a man or encouraging him to share his feelings can be good, but it has to be genuine, unselfish, and most of all timely. You don't have to act like an “easy” woman for men to like you, and you certainly don't have to play like he's some gift to the Earth. Doing these things actually works to subtly, at an subconscious level, lower your social status with a man, which has EVERYTHING to do with how he sees you as a woman.So if you think that making him more attracted to you means “playing to the man's fantasies” from the start, think again. You'll never succeed by looking for a man's approval, finding your way into his heart through sex and not being yourself.

MISTAKE #4: Sharing How You “Feel” Too Early With Him

Another huge and unfortunate mistake that most women make with men is sharing how they “feel” too early on.Listen...Attractive, single, successful men are rare. They get a LOT of attention from women. Most women don't realize this, but attractive men are being approached in one way or another all the time by women.And guess what?Attractive men have usually dated a lot of women.That's right. They have EXPERIENCE.They know what to expect.And one thing that turns an attractive men off and sends him running away faster than just about anything... It's a woman who starts saying “You know, I really, REALLY like you” after one or two dates. This signals to the man that you're just like one of those “clingy” stereotype women who want to rush into a relationship and can't control yourself from wanting a man to fulfill them and complete their lives. This does NOT spell ATTRACTION for a man.Don't do it. Lean back. Relax. There's a much better way...

MISTAKE #5: Misreading The Important “Signals” That Men Send

Men are constantly communicating how they feel about a woman and giving away big secrets about themselves. Most women don't pay attention to these signals or recognize them for what they really are.
The signals men send have 4 main levels:1) Social: Where the man is at in his own life - stability, confidence, direction
2) Emotional: Whether or not he's “emotionally available”
3) Physical: If he's attracted to you... and for what reasons
4) Love State: If he's open to building and growing a relationship in the future
The funny thing is that men send signals in these areas completely on accident. That's great news to women... Men can't help it! You need to learn to recognize these signals to get anywhere serious with a man.

MISTAKE #6: Relying On Your Natural Ability To Judge A Man's Character

People aren't easy to figure out. Especially men.
The last several years of my life I've spent hundreds of hours learning to understand people. I've studied peoples behavior, “inner psychology” and more specifically how they think and act when they're dating.From what I've seen, both men and women have their own secret ways of saying things. But you can only see these secret communications if you know what to look for. Women communicate with hints, body language, sarcasm, and flirting when they're first getting to know a man. They can either directly or indirectly let men know if they're open to something more serious. Men are different.Men generally communicate with sarcasm, humor, cockiness and other “indirect” displays of status. VERY RARELY will a man be able to honestly communicate to a woman whether or not he's ready or capable of developing a meaningful relationship. Aside from their sexual interests, men send very indirect signals about where they're at. If you don't know how to read through the signals men send, then you'll get the wrong message. Getting the wrong messages from men causes women more pain and heartache than any other issue around. You can avoid this pain if you learn to identify a good man from a bad one.

MISTAKE #7: Expecting A Relationship To Make You Happy

A mistake I've seen women make is thinking a guy will change her life and make her happy and fulfilled. And sure, there are situations and relationships where this happens. But those are the exceptions, not the rule. Nothing says “Run!” to a man faster than hearing or sensing that a woman immediately wants him to take care of her.And the men who ARE looking for this kind of situation aren't exactly the most healthy, loving, nurturing people out there. Think, “controlling, macho, or serious Mom Issues!”So let me be clear...I think it's important that people help fulfill each other in their lives, whether it's dating, a relationship, whatever. But if a woman communicates that she's looking for a guy to take care of her, complete her, make her whole, and all that kind of stuff - it has a VERY negative effect on what the man will think of her. It doesn't have to be spoken by the woman either...If a woman thinks or feels this way, the man will see it and pick up on it, regardless. This is arguably the worst thing a woman can do early on when dating a man.So what can you do as a woman?You can get the man interested and involved in your life in a more “natural” way, where he'll be motivated to make you care about your happiness and fulfillment on his own. This is the only way it really works for people - male or female. Self-motivation is much stronger than external motivation. But you have to know how to create this situation with a man... and it rarely happens by accident.

MISTAKE #8: Trying To “Convince” Him To Like You Or Love You

What do most women do when they meet a man that they REALLY like... but he's just not that interested or isn't as serious? Right! They try to “convince” the man to feel differently.
Well, I have news for you...YOU WILL NEVER CHANGE HOW A MAN “FEELS” WHEN IT COMES TO ATTRACTION! Never, ever, ever. You cannot convince a man to feel differently about you with “logic and reasoning”. Think about it. If a man doesn't “feel it” for you, how in the world do you expect to change that by being “reasonable” with him?But we all do it. Men are the worst at this by the way. They're always complimenting women who don't like them and buying them gifts. Women like the behavior sometimes, but it NEVER makes the woman like the man. She might enjoy what she gets out of it, but it doesn't change the way she FEELS about him. When a man just isn't interested, women will try and chase, compliment, convince and do their best to change his mind with logical and rational approaches. Bad idea. Another one that will never work.

MISTAKE #9: Not Knowing What To Do In Each Type Of Situation

A man has a clear idea of what he wants from a woman...And I don't mean just sex.I know, it might be hard to believe, but if you're out on a date with a man, he already has an idea of what he wants from you. And if you don't know HOW to find this out, and you just sit there looking at him and flirting, or trying things you think will make him want you, he won't help! If you don't know what to do in each situation, you'll probably screw it up... and LOSE EVERYTHING.

MISTAKE #10: Not Getting Help

This is the biggest mistake of all.This mistake keeps women from EVER having the kind of success and finding the kind of man and relationship that they truly want. I know, you don't like to make yourself look weak or helpless. We don't like to ask for help. Hey, I've been there myself.

Procrastination

2007-01-18T11:03:00.000+11:00

Today I woke up in the morning feeling lethargic as always.I kept on pushing for five more minutes of sleep until finally my body felt sick of lying in bed.Now I have a million things to do and I haven't got a clue what to do first since its my only free day from work.This is the result of PROCRASTINATION,which has plagued me since time immemorial.So in 07 that's another one of my resolutions...to try and be free from procastination.Here is a simple image that I got from www.brainshrub.com that denotes procastination.I think it's spot on!

My Fashion Odyssey

2007-01-17T21:33:00.001+11:00

For 2007,I want this to be a practical year for me and I want my sense of dress to be a sort of testament to this practicality and changing attitude.In particular am now yearning to go back to that Tomboyish look that dominated my early teen years.It seemed like a time that I was mostly comfortable in my "own skin".

So that granted,I have been out window-shopping for some simple funky size 8 t-shirts and raggedy type jeans,combat shorts and anything that will be in favour of me achieving my desired look.My mother used to buy me the best t-shirts she could find(some which have now been turned into mopping rags at digs...)and I now look to those days with fashion nostalgia.I miss my dolfin t-shirt..it was very surf-like.I also miss my bart simpson t-shirt which had a rude caption to it,which I will kindly not quote here!

But all in all,it is the year to be comfortable in my own skin, to have a charming austerity and most of all to be myself.To be confident in who I am and to radiate this quality to others around me.

So how do I go about this tom-boyish look while at the same time steering clear of the typical butchy dyke stereotype look? Coz I dont wanna chics hitting on me!That would definitely make me feel outta my tree!

Nipped In the Bud

2007-01-17T16:54:00.000+11:00

The sleep tonic fumes fade,
replaced now by a sharp ammoniac stench.
The banging headache threatens to give birth to another.
A jabbing left pain announces a broken rib or two,
Pins and needles shoot up her left leg ,
The right leg is wanting…
Paralysed.
Now jolted into reality by rapidly fading sensations…
Fear rises in her like a wave.
Her heart beats so hard that it threatens to leave a bruised mark on her chest.
She swallows her own fear of the inevitable,
Her main concern numbs every other .
She clutches the watch in her clammy hands.
His gold watch.
Its 6.25 as the morning light sips through the cracks of the tiny shanty,
That is her prison.
35 minutes to the inevitable sound of destruction,
A silent prayer is said…then murmurs of a lovers' song…
Their courting song.
Another prayer…3minutes left…
They skip like milliseconds.
Then the ugliest sound she has ever heard stings her ears,
And continues ringing in her ears for the next hour…
Their black and white love nipped in the bud,
While deep inside her grows a neutral being.

Of Recent Happenings

2007-01-17T16:28:00.000+11:00

Lately, one of my good friends lost a pal whom he had just been with 30 minutes before.It ached me when he told me what had transpired but the thing is, I wasn't there for him that instance that he needed a shoulder to cry on.I got enough offline messages pending on my pc and once I read his messages my thrill was turned into something else...not sadness in particular...maybe just empathy.Anyway to say the least, I am still waiting for my friend to contact me again and perharps I will be of some solace.
The whole tragedy got me thinking about the friends I have in my life.I think I have more online friends than I have real -life-physically-present-live-next-door kind of friends.It just happens that some of the people who know the real me have never actually met me physically!Blame it on technology and distance!And although they are 'cyber-friends' I do feel like I actually know them well enough too.There is something that prompts us to share the real 'us' with people who we have hardly met.Maybe its because we feel less vulnerable...when we spill our lifes' content, aches and pains to total strangers, because inertly we know that we wont have to be confronted by the same person the next day when we are more or less "together".
We feel the need to protect ourselves from other people's judgements...especially from those close to us.

Willpower and Drive

2007-01-17T15:12:00.000+11:00

Well, it's definately one of those days...My energy reserves are all sapped out by a manual dead-end job: that of POOP!and of all days...my blogging streak reawakens somewhere deep inside me mellowness and well, I simply can't resist it. Getting something interesting to talk about sometimes seems like a huge task so today I will go wherever the wind blows...
So about my dead-end job:aged care...I wouldn't wanna be caught dead doing this as a lifetime career...trust me the cons surpass the pros...right now all am thinking about aint even the money...just a list of things I gotta have once I'm paid...which is somewhere this week.My hands are itching to spend some hard earned cash...Shopping is one of my major stress relievers so to say I JUST CAN'T WAIT! That would be an understatement.A raw deal.
I have even jotted out a list of things I need and then prioritised them again and again...not sure now if getting an ipod before a new phone will make me happier or vice-versa...that now is my predicament!But you know what? Looking at the list, I am proud that I have set myself some goals which are definitely achievable and in the end of it...I will be broke and it will be back to square one but I will have these "trophies of achievement"....so now you understand why I say, I JUST CAN'T WAIT! to go shopping...
Money does make the world go round ...it does give one a sense of independence and there is nothing as liberating as having "purchasing power". Trust me I have spent many a day budgeting cent-wise, eating $1 noodles and basically being depressed about not having enough money to do the things I wanna do...things that could make me happy and feel wholesome.So I guess even if my job feels like it will be the death of me...am quite happy to cash out at the ATM at the end of the day!
All it takes as a bit of willpower (to wake up in the mornings!)and drive(because without it am just a dead-beat.)

For the Love of Bloggin'

2006-12-20T02:03:00.000+11:00

Blogging is fun,
Blogging is good.
I must admit,
That I can't be bothered sometimes,
But when am in the mood,
It feels so good,
Just like shaking my booty,
To a YingYang tune!
Or just going bananas,
Like the 'platano con salami' dudes!

The Clay Aiken Inspiration...

2006-12-20T00:03:00.000+11:00

This post is dedicated to one of my best pals, Jackie.
Music has always been her first love and I hope Clay Aiken's leap into stardome will inspire her immensely .Special thanks to Youtube coz without it I wouldn't have been able to get the videos otherwise.Let your voice be heard!
Please note that this post is in no way attempting to promote Aiken in any commercial way, or the AI(American Idol) and any other entities shown here.
It is all inspirational material. Worded by Joan.

Clay Aiken's Story as a role-model.

Perhaps,his looks if anything might have landed him on the set of Mr. Bean because of his geeky nature but his voice which is really larger than life did help in his transformation from geek to hero in the music and entertainment world. Clay's faith in himself, his positive and mature take on critique,both harsh and supportive, and also a huge and dedicated fanbase did help propel him to become the 1st runners up in the 2003 American Idol and now he is a recognised star whose light is ever shining so bright.
Personally, I find his "Without you" performance very compelling and moving and dedicate it to Jackie.

Clay's First Audition in AI.

Clay's Interview on the Ellen DeGeneres Show.
I think he is funny!

A Fan's pledge to Aiken...

"Without You"...Clay Aiken.

I love his Beetles-like Makeover.
Actually,all his music is absolutely flawless...check it out on Youtube!

Fishing Trip @ Marysville

2006-12-05T13:10:00.000+11:00

Exquisite Scenery

He thought it would be a great idea to roast my arse!

Gotta have music...

and fuel...

The Food was colourful !

For the Real Meat Lovers, there was Lamb and Chicken too! Looks so good!

The Trout was

d.e.l.i.c.i.o.u.s!

To catch a big Salmon...

Adhiambo...

2006-12-05T12:59:00.001+11:00

Contrasts

2006-12-05T12:49:00.000+11:00

My pal called it Pleasure and Pain.
Also, the experience of space in 3D,
There is the interior, exterior and the viewer.

Quote of the Day

2006-11-29T16:17:00.000+11:00

"...not used, not second-hand, but rather, PRE-OWNED."

Melbourne Trams

2006-11-28T16:45:00.000+11:00

Click on image to get larger view!

Yesterday's Quote of the Day

2006-11-28T13:29:00.000+11:00

"...don't go running naked without me!"

by s@ggy.

Melbourne Central

2006-11-28T13:15:00.000+11:00

Scorned I

2006-11-26T01:21:00.002+11:00

paper cut a rendition of edward scissorhand a cherubic soul in this tragic world heart stubbed by the hurtful words that come forth from your red lipstick mouth pearly whites tight lipped pouty its all a burlesque act life and you are a class act b***h they say "do it for the kids" but heck you know you'd still do it anyway excuse me not! Black and white silent movie is my life without you come "paint my life with colour" and then lets run to the church on the hill coz sooner or later we will come tambling down like Jack and Jill. dark thoughts heart throbs temple ticks muffled laughs smoky hill checkered bill haughty looks clenched fist blood stained blouse stealthy tip-toe tap-dance to death's song lusty kiss bulletproof conscience slow dance

Scorned II

He said that he was committed...

but now i realise that it was only to himself!

Those days that I cried myself to sleep...

are slowly fading ...

As I rise up from the hang-ups of feeling scorned and scorched,

by his cold, cold...LOVE?

as Dido sang... "Am bored of hanging out in your cold."

and now, a new love blooms,

in the murky waters of the last.

So now, You tell me?

Who feels scorned?

ONLY IN MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA

2006-11-21T19:59:00.000+11:00

HINT!

2006-11-20T18:01:00.000+11:00

hInT!
To make font appear
larger...

Hold down Ctrl key and zoom in with mouse.

...without Light there would be no Architecture...

2006-11-20T17:20:00.000+11:00

It is perhaps not too radical to suggest that without light there would be no architecture. Architecture is drawn
from light; light helps us to experience architecture as form and space, material and colour, structure and detail.
Light reveals architecture as both meaningful form and inhabitable space.[i] Light helps us to see buildings in
form and detail; it helps us to navigate our way in and around them, and it helps us to undertake the various
activities for which buildings are made. It is at once poetic and pragmatic, and for many architects, is the most
significant ingredient in the making of space. Marco Frascari has even suggested that light is a material out of
which architecture is created. [ii]
The principal source of light is the sun, which provides natural light directly, as sunlight, and indirectly, as
daylight, which both illuminate interiors by passing through windows. When light from the sun is not
available, it can be created by combustion, by burning wood or wax, oil or gas. Or it can be created through
the artifice of electricity, using lamps to convert energy into light. Together, natural and artificial light give
variety and flexibility to the way buildings are seen, the way they are used, and the way they are designed. In
the past several centuries, technologies for both natural and artificial light have changed dramatically,
facilitated in particular by the remarkable properties of glass.[iii] For natural light, advances in structure,
framing, and waterproofing of glass have changed the type and location of windows that can be created. For
artificial light, developments in filaments, phosphors, and gases all rely on the protective veil of glass to
transmits the light that is created. Changes in materials and finishes available for construction have also
affected the behaviour of light, by changing the way it is reflected, absorbed, or transmitted by the surfaces
that define built space. In particular, ‘specular’ reflections from highly polished or reflective surfaces, can be
used to multiply the image of an object or light source as seen within a space. This is a key architectural
strategy significant in the choice of materials and features such as water, marble, mirrors and glass.[iv]

[i] Marietta S. Millet, Light Revealing Architecture, New York: Van Nostrand Reinhold, 1996.
[ii] Marco Frascari, “The lume materiale in the Architecture of Venice” Perspecta 24, fall 1988, pp. 136-145.
[iii] Michael Wigginton, Glass in Architecture, London : Phaidon, 1996.
[iv] Mary Ann Steane, “Environmental Diversity and Natural Lighting Strategies,” in Steemers and Steane
(eds). Environmental Diversity in Architecture, pp. 159-178.